I hope mine doesn't look like that
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
