I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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