she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
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