First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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