Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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