Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
