Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
