i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize