it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
