he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth