Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
