Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
