butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
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Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
