Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
It's just like the Real World with babies
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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