Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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