The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize