A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
