I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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