; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
farters have to be the big spoon...
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Dignity is for republicans.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
