That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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