Nicole vs. Life
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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