Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize