I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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