There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your signature on my underwear?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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