At least make sure they are 18
Why
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
