in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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