dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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