id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
