shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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