were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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