is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
