You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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