we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Terrible idea I love it
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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