Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
