Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize