Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize