at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Mom said you looked used
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Randomize
