We're facebook friends in real life
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I think we might need a safe word for this...
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
