Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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