i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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