think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
We are all done wearing pants today
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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