it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
