They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize