i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize