You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize