It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
