Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
