she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
