is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
