watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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