My boss' voice literally gives me gas
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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